Many people have in their life had great opportunities to find the love of their life. Love is much like a tender flower. To see it blossom to its full glory, you need to tender and care for it. The same is true about creating and maintaining a loving relationship.
This partly explains why many people may have experienced it and just let it slip through their fingers. And now, such people are but wishing if only they could turn back the hands of time.
To have “a happy ever after” in any relationship can only come to full realization through a sense of commitment to the success of that relationship by the parties involved.
The more mature and self-aware we are before entering into a relationship, the better the odds of that relationship succeeding. As we grow older, we connect with more and more people in our daily lives, and encounter various circumstances.
Through these connections, we experience changes and create new perceptions in our value system and ideals. At the same time, we might occasionally override those we held previously.
However, the fundamentals of any relationship are basically the same. This includes relationships with our family, friends, colleagues at work, and even our neighbors.
The following are a few salient points we need to consider as we strive to create and maintain long-term loving relationships.
Mirror Yourself
Most people spend a lot of time talking about finding the right partner in their lives. However, it would be much if they flip the situation. They should instead spend more of that time talking about being the right person for their partner.
What qualities are you looking for in your partner? Do you have any of them in your own life? You need to have a paradigm shift about relationships for a change.
There’s something you need to realize about looking for the right person that’ll fill the void in your life. And that is that you also have to be the right partner for that person. Achieving this state of mind will greatly help you attract people who are aligned to your true self.
As you come to this self-realization, you’ll soon begin to unconsciously come to terms with certain facts. Part of that realization is the fact that every successful relationship requires two conscious individuals.
Two individuals who have commitments to seeing that their relationship work. You’ll also notice that these two individuals are ready to make changes. They’ll readily make any necessary individual changes to achieve their goals for the relationship. This is one very significant part of what creating and maintaining a loving relationship really entails.
Have Clear and Realistic Goals
A lot of people set unrealistic ideals of who they want their future partner be. Many are also very unwilling to make any necessary compromises.
Firstly, we need to distinctly clarify what our values, needs, and the lifestyle we prefer are. This way, we’ll be in a better position to attract the right person to fulfill these needs.
Learn to Love Yourself
Learning to love one’s self is one is the primal factors in finding true love and happiness. This is both with ourselves and in our relationships with other. Our deepest of emotions or even the most dismissive of our thoughts have a way of naturally coming true in our lives.
The universe generally gives back to us what we are asking it for. And most times it doesn’t matter how insignificant that request might seem to be.
Love is no exception to this rule. Therefore, we must first love the person that we are no matter what our assumed inadequacies about ourselves might be. The love you have for your true person will inadvertently bring that love you have been dreaming of to you. However, that love must first grow from within you to become a reality in your very life.
Take Responsibility
We must internalize the fact that the success of our relationships rest on us. We don’t need to put the source of our frustrations and the solutions to our problems entirely on external forces.
Take full responsibility for your feelings and action and avoid playing the blaming game. Instead of always blaming others, you should look at situations more critically. Try to look at where you might have fallen short in your responsibilities that might have led to that situation.
You also need to stop trying to change others. Instead, learn to start changing yourself from within. This is a more proven way to finding true happiness and harmony in a love relationship.
Spend Quality Time Together and Communicate Effectively
Several research studies show that communication is a hallmark trait in all healthy and thriving love relationships. Lack of effective communication breeds misunderstanding, tension, and unhappiness and brings about relationship failures.
Creating and maintaining a loving relationship requires being a good communicator. Communicating well with your partner needs you to be able to express yourself. More importantly, it requires you to be a good listener. This involves you being able to listen attentively to your partner without being judgmental in any form.
Also, research shows interesting facts about couples who spend the most amount of time alone together. In general, such couples tend to have the highest level of satisfaction in their relationships.
One way to go about this to try and actively engage in various kinds of common activities together. These might include actively being involved in children upbringing together.
You might also want to create room for activities that bring both of you into more frequent closer personal contact. Such opportunities should provide an avenue to think about and share ideas and solutions together.
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