In reality, a breakup doesn’t necessarily end a relationship. The commitment is what is doe away with when couples breakup and go their separate ways. As is often the case, there are things that still bind them together.
Some people believe that staying closer to your ex is the best way to easily get back together. This idea is very counterproductive. It is something that you must desist from after a breakup.
How do you expect your ex to value the part you have played in their lives hitherto the breakup? How do you imagine that happening if you’re always pestering them with your presence? This is perhaps one the biggest problems most people face in their attempts to win back their ex.
There are certain steps to take when trying to win your ex back. The first thing to do is to assess and understand what lead to the breakup in the first place. This understanding helps to determine if you should try winning your ex back or to move on.
It is imperative to carry out this wholehearted evaluation of the causes of the breakup. Next, there must be a true conviction of why you want your ex back. You might also want to see if there are any chances your ex might be willing be to come back. It is only after getting these assurances that you can proceed towards winning your ex back.
The hereunder advice would be of immense benefit in assisting you to win your ex back.
Apologize but Don’t Argue Over the Breakup
If the breakup was because of something you did, then you must apologize to your ex first. Apologize but do not beg for forgiveness or for your ex to take you back. Recognizing that you were wrong, accepting it and learning from it is important. This will help you to change your actions in the future.
Also, arguing over the reasons for the breakup should be avoided by all means. Winning the argument over who did what is not going to help you in winning your ex back. Instead, this has the resultant effect of irritating your ex. It might even push them further away from you.
Improve Yourself
Avoid grieving over your ex for too long. Instead, become personally motivated in your daily life. This will greatly help in enhancing your attractiveness. This has the effect of easily robbing off on others around you. You can even become positively noticed by your ex.
It is also important to make serious improvements in your general physical appearance. Buy new clothes if you have to and have a new hairdo. You can also take up physical fitness sessions if you are not already doing so.
It is very important to understand that you cannot fake the mindset you need to get your ex back. It will naturally radiate itself. These positive lifestyle activities will help rebuild your self-confidence. Thus, it will improve your value in the eyes of your ex and others.
Your self-confidence is the most important personal factor in getting your ex back. So it is important you work on it daily.
Give Your Ex Some Space
Absence, they say makes the heart grow fonder. Creating space for reflective thoughts is the best way to appraise your failed relationship. This is where the “no contact rule” becomes extremely important. It will go a long way in helping your chances of getting your ex back.
Even when communicating with your ex, resist the urge to contact them too often. The more you try incessantly to contact them, the more resistant your ex might becomes. This way you might even end up driving them away completely.
Let your communication with your ex be of an obligatory nature. This is critical immediately following the breakup. It should also be sustained until there are strong evidence that they really want you back. Whatever you do, do not lose contact completely.
Be Flexible
Any form of begging, looking clingy, or appearing desperate should be avoided. The need to appear independent and strong emotionally are also very important. While these are all important, there’s still the need to be flexible when dealing with your ex.
Flexibility is also important even during the “no contact rule” period. If situations arise that you critically need to contact your ex, you definitely have to do so.
You need to emphasize your personal qualities and strive to be a person of importance. This should apply in both your personal and social life as you try to win your ex back. At the same time it is paramount to adapt and compromise as situations arises.
Avoid anything that would add unnecessary tension to the situation at hand. Try to pay attention, listen more, and be sympathetic towards your ex.
